Summer is on its way! It is time to get stocked up on all of your favorite summertime styles from Shinesty. I am crazy about Shinesty because they sell the quirkiest, yet coolest clothing and accessories ever! Their sense of humor is dry, just like my own.
Shinesty has curated the wildest beach & spring break party suits, funny bathing suits and trunks, 90s sunglasses, printed short sleeve button-ups and suits, Hawaiian shirts, and other identity-disguising clothing so you’ll have the greatest mug-shot ever taken on your vacations- or STAY cations. Who cares, at least you will look cool.
I have chosen my FAVORITE pieces from this collection, and I am doing my best to portray them below. (My models had crappy cameras!) I will never hire them again! I will just be MY OWN MODEL, and show my OWN lumpy butt next time. But then again, MY camera isn’t much better….but here goes:
Look at this adorable Tropical Flamingo wrap dress! My modeling pictures do not do it justice! It is so cute and comfortable!
Here is how Shinesty describes this fabulous dress:
Shinesty named this tropical pink flamingo dress the Flamingal because, well, it’s a flamingo wrap dress for gals. Their inspiration for the design, however, was much more thought out. Although this tropical dress fits equally as well at any Miami club as it does on daybreak bender, it was designed for 3 specific reasons:
1. Flamingos are the international sign of swingers.(I am definitely NOT a swinger, however!)
2. Flamingos make excellent lawn ornaments, so nobody will bug you when you pass out on the lawn.
3. Flamingos only mate after 5:00 pm, the international time for drinking. So whether your bumping uglies or boozing, you’ll instinctually fit in.
(sources not sited as statistics are not based in fact)
Here are a few more pics of me wearing this fun summery frock:
(I hated my hair that day, and I never seem to take very good selfies. But at least it was sunny outside, which is rare for Oregon in April!)
(My poor little twelve year-old son was bribed to take these pictures. He did the best he could. Thank you, Braxton!)
And look at these His & Hers swim suits! Does it remind you of anything in particular? I am smitten by this Dixie Cup swim wear! It is right up my alley!
I had asked my my daughter and son-in-law to model these hilariously classic swim suits, because I thought my body wasn’t in shape enough, but Myelie took these crappy pictures with a dirty bathroom mirror. Next time, I will model the suit myself! (But then again, my bathroom mirror isn’t much cleaner!)
Imagine all of the inquisitive looks and stares you will get when you arrive at a public swimming pool donning this duo! People will be thinking, “Hmmm, where have I seen THAT design before?” I can only imagine what a conversation starter the Dixie Cup swimsuit and trunks will be! I am jealous now, because I wanted that attention for myself! Just kidding! I HAD to share with my daughter and her husband because my girl fell in love with this quirky swim wear. (She shares my sense of humor!) Plus, her bum is perkier than mine, so it’s all good!
Here is how Shinesty describes the Dixie Cup swimwear duo: (Not my words, haha.)
Bottom line, these swim trunks and one piece are nostalgic as shit. They carry the type of nostalgia AOL and Ask Jeeves are jealous of. They’re made with a decade of bowl cuts, Tamagotchi pets, and Skip-Its.
We introduce to you the most notorious print design from the 90s for your nuts and girl bums. If Instagram celebrity and serial copy-paster Fuck Jerry can make a quick buck off this design, we will too.
Check out all of Shinesty’s new summer styles here! And don’t forget to enter the giveaway below, where you will get the chance to win the swimwear of your choice from Shinesty. (Up to a $100 value!)
Giveaway
Enter to win! One winner will receive the swimwear of their choice from Shinesty. (Up to a $100 value.)
How? It’s easy! Just fill out the Giveaway Tools form below for your chance to win!
For more information, or to check out the rest of Shinesty’s fun styles, visit: https://www.shinesty.com
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