Being a parent to children of any age is one of the most fulfilling experiences in life. But it can often come with different challenges and even surprises! Between diaper changes, the terrible twos, sleepless nights, and learning how to meet the needs of tiny human beings, parents often find themselves so caught up in the day-to-day tasks that they forget to nurture their own selves, needs, and relationships in their lives.
This is completely normal, and very understandable when you are a parent because there is going to be so much going on and everything moves so quickly. You probably feel like there is no time or rest at all in parenthood. However, where possible, it can be a good idea to try and include some small things in your life that will support you as a parent. There are some key things that are often neglected, or forgotten about, that can help make your parenting journey smoother, happier, and more fulfilling. Here are a few things to consider and help you on your journey, as well as the whole family.
1. Self-care
Self-care definitely seems like a luxury to be able to do, especially when you are right in the middle of the demands and challenges of parenthood. However, this is a point in your life where it has never been more important. Of course, you want to put your baby and their needs first, but that doesn’t mean neglecting your well-being is right. With the constant stress, physical exhaustion, and lack of sleep, you will find that your energy levels, your appetite, your mood, and overall health are going downhill. This is not a path you want to go down. You want to be able to have the capacity to look after your children.
This is where practicing self-care comes in. It does not mean booking a spa day (but of course, you can do that!) but if you are short on time and capacity, then there are much smaller and more manageable self-care habits that you can engage in that, over time, will make a big difference. See where you are able to take a walk, even if this means with your baby in the pushchair. Consider how you can incorporate more veggies in your day, e.g. with some frozen packets stocked in the freezer. Where possible, rest. If your baby takes a nap, this could be a good chance for you to do the same. A huge part of this process is going to be asking for help when you need it, and learning how to set time aside for an activity or hobby for yourself.
2. Support network
Parenting, while you are bringing new life into the world, can feel incredibly isolating in the process. Many parents struggle to ask for help, thinking it is a sign of weakness or feeling like they have to do everything alone. However, the fact of the matter is, that a reliable support network is vital to your health and success. Consider how much you would support a friend or family member who needs it and see if you can begin to let people in.
Reconnect with close friends and family members who you can trust and who make you smile. There are many online and in-person parenting communities that you can join for practical and emotional support.
The kind of support that you want to seek will cover physical, mental, and emotional things for you. You may want a friend to confide in, and someone else to seek advice from. You may also want someone who you can trust to look after your baby while you take an hour out for yourself.
3. Routines
Creating healthy routines isn’t just for you, it is for the whole household. Flexibility isn’t something you necessarily need right at the beginning of your journey, but it can come in handy. But even more than that, it can help the entire household feel more secure by providing structure, stability, and predictability, which is a huge part of happy children and their development. People, and babies, in particular, thrive on consistency. If you create a daily rhythm, you will be able to manage your expectations for the day and better meet your baby’s needs.
Start with small routines where you can, for example, set a regular feeding schedule. It doesn’t have to be rigid or complicated. It should fit your lifestyle. You can then begin to fit in things like regular bathtime and bedtime. It can seem a bit challenging at first, especially with naps, as you will need to consider what sleep schedule is best for your baby, as well as learning about your baby and their needs. Different age groups are going to need different naps, so make sure you work this into your schedule so you can anticipate their needs. It isn’t just for babies; you also need to consider the best bedtime for infants and other ages too.
4. Meeting the needs of everyone in the home
Your children, regardless of their ages, are going to take priority. That is normal. But if you have others in your household, for example, a partner, family members, or pets, then trying to foster some kind of balance is really key. This can keep the mental and physical well-being of everyone in the house good.
Start by considering how you can manage and balance the family dynamics. Everyone is going to have different wants and needs, so that is a good place to start. Practice communicating openly with your family members about what these are and consider how a schedule can be created so everyone’s needs are balanced, along with things like chores and nighttime duties.
Being a parent is one of the most beautiful journeys to embark on, however, it can also be one of the most challenging. Focusing on things like self-care, creating a support network, and fostering routines that are beneficial for everyone, can make this journey smoother for the household.
I love my parents very much.